You Might Be An Internet Marketing Redneck If…
You might be an internet marketing
redneck jackass if you…
1. Automate Blog Comments
Seriously? It’s the year 2012 and you’re still spamming the f*** out of blogs? Do you realize there are some people who actually care about the message that they’re sharing on their personal blogs and you’re just spamming them about your diet pills and bullshit offers?
Did you not realize that Google gives you no credit for your spam comment links? Did you not realize that you’re wasting thousands of peoples time just so that you can pretend like you’re doing something productive?
2. Use Scrapebox or Other BlackHat SEO Software
If you’re still using that crappy spam software, you are pretty much internet marketing scum.
3. Sell Links From Your 35,632 Blogs
We know your blogs are 100% spam. No one can manage the content for that many real sites. Stop calling your blogs high quality because you paid someone who can’t even speak English to write your articles, or even worse, you just have software that syndicates other peoples RSS feeds on your site. That’s just spam dude. Stop spamming already.
The fact that you would even take money from people and sell them a link from your spam site which is 100% spam and worthless in the first place is just sad.
4. You Syndicate the Same Cheap Articles Again and Again and Again and Again and Again…
This is the best.
Okay, so like, you hire someone who can’t speak English to write a really shitty article that if someone was actually looking for that information it would totally confuse them. Then, you syndicate that article to hundreds, no wait better yet thousands, of article directories.
Not enough spam yet? Why not just spin that article a few hundred times and then submit all those new
spinned spam articles to another couple thousand article directories. Hey, 10,000 crappy articles can’t be wrong! You must be the world’s leading authority on Mesothelioma.
5. You Post On Forums All Day Long or Hire Someone To Post On Forums
You know what, some people might not have seen your 100,000
spinned spam articles yet. Why not go straight to the source and find those people in forums and send them links to your squeeze page? Then you could email them more information about how you’ve written over 100,000 articles and each one of them is completely incoherent to any human being who would dare to attempt to read them.
6. You Spend All Your Time “Syndicating” Your Content Instead of Writing Fresh Articles
This is a great one. The common logic goes, “Hey, the news sites syndicate content from the Associated Press so if I syndicate my content, I’ll look like an authority site too!” No – you won’t. You’ll look like a spammer.
Others will say, “Well, Google expressly stated in the Panda update that syndicated/duplicate content does not penalize your site!” Yeah – they said that. If you believe what Google says in it’s press releases about SEO then the jokes on you.
7. You Sell Solos By Buying Solos From People Who Bought Solos From People Who Bought Solos From People Who Bought Solos…
“Solos for sale! Get your clicks here people!” cry these brilliant internet marketers. You see, they never created a product, blog, podcast show, or video that really added value to anyone’s life so they couldn’t build a list that way. Instead, they just decided to buy solos…and buy more solos…and buy more solos…
And they just keep buying solos from other people who… just bought solos. And on and on it goes. Basically, it’s just a bunch of people paying each other to send affiliate links to the same group of people who just bounce around from list to list and no one ever says something new, creative, or helpful.
This is why you should be careful when you buy solos – don’t just buy cheap solos because they’re cheap. It’s all about quality. If someone only knows how to build a list by buying solos, chances are their list sucks.
8. You Think That Next Piece Of Internet Marketing Software Will Change The World
These internet marketers think that it’s all about software, software, software. “Hey, have you seen the latest blog-spammer-comment-gizmo-2000-SEONUKEx-Awesomesauce software? It’s the bomb!”
Software and technology is THE LEAST important part of an internet marketers business. The most important part is 1) solving problems with great content and great products and 2) marketing and 3) technology according to Frank Kern. And I have a feeling Frank knows something about making money online.
Do you ever see Frank Kern or other influential internet marketers spamming comments on blogs? Then why would you??
9. You Build Sites For The Express Purpose of Making Money From AdSense Alone
Hey, I’ve got this great business idea – it revolves around creating a really shitty website and putting ads on it. Would you like to invest in my Made-For-Adsense website??
P.S. Google is shutting down these sites faster than ever. It’s kind of like Google’s latest updates were like those new BugZapper 8000 units being placed all over the internet landscape. ZAP! There goes another dead bug.
10. You AutoBlog
Here’s a brilliant idea. Let’s just steal other people’s blog posts and post them on my site. Better yet, let’s have a robot do all the work instead of me.
11. You Sell Your Spam Sites On Flippa
This takes AutoBlogging to a whole new level. Okay, here’s how to get rich online (and waste a lot of people’s time).
First, create an autoblog.
Second, populate the autoblog with ads and affiliate links.
Third, sell your site on Flippa for $100.
Fourth, rinse and repeat a million times.
Fifth, go down in the world’s hall of fame for being the biggest spammer on Planet Earth.
12. You Resell PLR Content From People Who Resell PLR Content…
This one’s from Stephen Henry’s Facebook Comments:
“There’s a whole bucket full of newbie IMers who are hopeful of making millions by buying resale-rights publications from other newbie IMers who are hopeful of making millions by buying resale-rights publications from…”
13. Add Your Own
Know some more great ways to become an internet marketing jackass and spam the internet? Post your comments below and we’ll add the best ideas!
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